A Day in the life of an new (ish) dad

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12240142_10154126032523274_4851441122606053758_nThey say that looking after a child is hard work. Well, it’
s about time that I found out …
Six months. That’s how much time I have had to prepare for a day of looking after my son. Not that I haven’t looked after him before. I have. Many times, but I have always had the assurance that my wife was just a room away, or a street away or at least in the same city. Today was different. She was in another county with very little phone signal.

If there were tears (either mine or my sons) I would have to deal with it. How would I know if he was hungry? How could I tell if he was happy, sad, tired, playful, in need of changing. What if I looked away and he fell, or rolled into a chair or the fireplace. How would I know if of he was okay

Well, it turns they can tell you.
They cry…
…or they don’t

You get to learn the sounds. My wife is a natural. She seems to know what our son is thinking and more importantly, what he is doing.

“That’s his tired cry.”
“That’s his ‘I’m Hungry’ cry.”
“That’s his cry to tell us he needs changing.”
“He’s crying ’cause he wants to be picked up.”

But they all sound the same … don’t they?
If I was a musical prodigy with a highly tuned sense of hearing I may be able to tell the difference between the ‘I want milk’ cry and the ‘i’m bored of staring at the ceiling, can i be picked up’ cry. I may be able to sense when he is wanting some rice pudding, or when he fancies some carrot sticks. Does he want milk, or does he want to chew on the cats tail? Who can tell? Who knows?

And then he doesn’t cry. He is quiet. It’s peaceful, wonderful. Silent. Is he asleep?
He is asleep isn’t he?
Is he breathing? Oh my god, he’s been quiet for ten minutes and I didn’t notice.I was too busy watching some random TV show on Netflix. Is there petrol in the car in case i need to rush him to hospital. Where is the hospital? What’s his date of birth, national insurance number. Will the doctors think I’m a bad parent, would my wife ever speak to me again if I somehow damaged her son.

Arrrh, He is breathing. He is smiling. He seems to be having a dream. Is he dreaming up new ways to worry me? The little git. How am I supposed to know what’s going on?

My wife does. It seems to be built in to her genetic makeup. Woman seemed to know what their baby wants and of that I am in total awe. It is a talent that very few man seem to have and actually it seems a little unfair. Baby’s know what they want. Woman know what babies want. Men however don’t seem to know what either of them wants. Maybe the battle of the sexes is far from over and us men are struggling to catch up.



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